You have put your finger on something. Gifts sadly don't mean anything if you buy whatever you want, whenever you want it, and you merely let someone else drive the car for a day while you navigated. Then, if it's not something that you would have obtained on your own, the reaction can be, "I didn't want this, anyway. I don't want to spend time with this. This is a gain in money, but a loss in time." So gifts lose meaning if the recipient is neither needy or open-minded.
A broader question is how and if we can help each other. I have long been skeptical of "help." When people are going through tough times, they are often offered help. But help is usually not something that can be summoned on command. It takes thoughtfulness, and there are limited opportunities. Gifts, to me, seem like this desire for easy help. They seem to symbolize that. But value is too precious to just created by snapping one's fingers, or by giving something (including money).
Congratulations on the Kirkus review! It must be like getting one's PhD. But my general impression of PhDs is that one's committee generally makes one feel like they granted it under duress, while this was totally a positive review.
I also was struck by the themes of motherhood and parenthood in your work. I was surprised at your book reading when you said that only one of your stories was about being a mother. I thought that if ever a work qualified as one that should be read at a Pen Parentis salon, yours was it. You wrote about so many facets of parenthood, but in a smooth way, without straining and hitting your reader over the head with the theme. It just felt like parenthood infused your work. As always, I could be off-base.
You have put your finger on something. Gifts sadly don't mean anything if you buy whatever you want, whenever you want it, and you merely let someone else drive the car for a day while you navigated. Then, if it's not something that you would have obtained on your own, the reaction can be, "I didn't want this, anyway. I don't want to spend time with this. This is a gain in money, but a loss in time." So gifts lose meaning if the recipient is neither needy or open-minded.
A broader question is how and if we can help each other. I have long been skeptical of "help." When people are going through tough times, they are often offered help. But help is usually not something that can be summoned on command. It takes thoughtfulness, and there are limited opportunities. Gifts, to me, seem like this desire for easy help. They seem to symbolize that. But value is too precious to just created by snapping one's fingers, or by giving something (including money).
Congratulations on the Kirkus review! It must be like getting one's PhD. But my general impression of PhDs is that one's committee generally makes one feel like they granted it under duress, while this was totally a positive review.
I also was struck by the themes of motherhood and parenthood in your work. I was surprised at your book reading when you said that only one of your stories was about being a mother. I thought that if ever a work qualified as one that should be read at a Pen Parentis salon, yours was it. You wrote about so many facets of parenthood, but in a smooth way, without straining and hitting your reader over the head with the theme. It just felt like parenthood infused your work. As always, I could be off-base.
it is always such a joy to read your thoughtful comments, David!
I am so humbled by your knowledge of the art world. It would take a billion Pokemon Gos to even the scales.
so great about Kirkus!
as for gifts, I can't stand being told what to give someone!
I hear you on that - I do not see a difference between this and giving cash.